7 Things That Prove Toddlers Are Crazy

Toddlers are crazy. They do things that no sane person would ever attempt. Stop for a minute and think about it. If any adult acted in the same way that most toddlers act you would have them committed. These are only a couple of the examples that prove, toddlers are crazy.

7 – They Hate Sleep. – Seriously, who hates sleep? Other then toddlers can you think of anyone else that never wants to sleep. I understand not wanting to go to bed. There may be something good on tv or you may be meeting up with friends. But you at least sleep in the next morning. Not my daughter. Also don’t say I just need to put her to bed later. If she went to bed at 8pm she will be up by 6am. Or she could go to bed at 5:45am and still would be up at 6 am. Naps? I would get less resistance to a trip to the dentist than an hour mid afternoon nap. The worst part is when she doesn’t sleep, I don’t sleep, and I’m tired.

6 – Toddlers are horrible liars. – Like most toddlers when my daughter does something wrong she tries to blame it on someone else. When her sister is nearby I can kind of understand it. But lately, she is blaming her sister for doing things when her sister isn’t home. It is impossible for her sister to have pushed her down when she is 15 miles away. It is obviously a lie. I also know Mommy probably wasn’t the one who made a mess in her room. Which leaves the question does she actually believe her lies? Is she just lazy? Too busy to be concerned with coming up with something new? Or does she really think this is going to work, and if she does how dumb does she think I am?

5 – They are too picky – This one completely baffles me. My daughter will lose he mind if you give her a glass of milk and it isn’t in the color glass she wanted. I understand with many liquors or beers certain glassware can enhance flavors and scents. I do not believe the color of this particular plastic glass has that effect on apple juice. Personally, I just don’t care. But to my toddler having the wrong color can completely destroy the meal.

4 – They have no idea of what causes things – While potty training my daughter, I heard a scream followed by lots of tears. I ran in there sacred. What could she have possibly done  that would elicit that kind of a response? I found her sitting on the potty tears streaming down her face. “It’s too stinky in here to go potty,” she said between sobs. Personally, I think you give up the right to be offended at a bodily smell when said smell is coming from you. While I do find it funny she didn’t want to be in there, I  had to agree,  it stunk in there.

3 – They don’t want to go to or leave preschool. – For about a month this was my daughter’s favorite type of crazy. We would drop her off at her preschool and she would lose it. Crying, snot bubbles, the works, all in an attempt to keep my wife or I from leaving her there. Then two hours later when we returned to pick her up, we would see the same performance. The only difference is, this time, she didn’t want us to take her home. She didn’t want to be there and didn’t want to leave. But I have to be honest with two tantrum and it not even being lunch time yet I kinda wanted to leave her there too.

2 – They insist on doing something themselves, mess it up and get mad at you because it’s messed up. – This one happens way to often at my house. My daughter will decide she can do something herself. In this case, let’s say she is pouring herself a glass of milk, something she knows she isn’t supposed to do alone. Inevitably the milk ends up spilled and all over her and the floor. She will then proceed to throw a tantrum because she is wet and there is no more milk. Or, the time she decided to stuff all her

1 – She got what she wanted – The most frustrating thing is the tantrum that follows a toddler getting exactly what they ask for. My daughter will ask for something for lunch. In the time it takes me to prepare it, she will change her mind and absolutely lose it. A shirt she loves and asks to wear every day will suddenly be the most uncomfortable shirt in the world. She doesn’t know what she wants and somehow, it’s my fault for believing her when she says that is what she wants.

What about you? What do your kids do that are crazy? Leave a comment below, and don’t forget to share this with anyone else who is dealing with these little lunatics.


Photo from Matt Grommes Flickr.com – CC




Bryan Alkire

Bryan is a Stay at Home Dad from Kalamazoo MI. Every day he is lucky enough to experience the joys and struggles of raising his two young girls. His older daughter, a brain tumor survivor, has just started school. His younger daughter is a ball of energy that always keeps him on his toes. He chronicles his adventures with his girls and beautiful wife on his blog www.kzoodad.com. When not watching the girls he plays golf (badly), enjoys craft beer, and working on that book he keeps promising to get done.

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